Tyrone Mayberry, a known child molester, wanted to do a nice thing for a teenager in his neighborhood. “I just wanted to buy her an iPod so that she could listen to some music. I wanted to engrave a message on the back so that she would always remember me whenever she listens to songs like ‘My Humps’ or ‘F**k You Like an Animal’. I can’t even do that now without being censored. They wouldn’t do this to a white man”, an irate Mayberry told us. “Everybody knows that George Bush hates black people, and now we know that the Apple guy do too,” he continued.

Apparently, Apple had replaced certain words with asterisks on the engraving of an iPod. The message came out as “I want to **** your tight little ***hole with my ****. Macdiculous was not able to get a copy of the uncensored text originally submitted. When we asked Mr. Mayberry what the original text was, he replied “Go **** yourselves with a ****ing **** and **** my ****.

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